#202 Word of the Year
7:02 AM
So I recently read an article from SobreMeStories.com, and it resonated so deeply with me. Not too long after read it, I had the pleasure of hanging out with some of the ladies in my neighborhood before my neighbor Deepty went to Austin, TX for her husband's job. During that dinner with them, my other neighbor (saying "neighbor" a lot here) Melinda mentioned her word this year was "intentional". To be intentional in her job, intentional with her daughter, and even more intentional with her husband and friendships. Then about a week after that, I saw on one of the Facebook pages I follow about how there should be a specific word you choose to define your marriage. It all made me think more and more about what my defining word would be for this year.
And I keep going back to the Sobre Me Stories post, and would it be okay to choose more than ONE word? It is? Okay good.
Assume the best.
And as I typed that, I realized God has already pushed me about 10 different times to try and assume the best, and what do I do? Assume the worst.
Unfortunately the assumption of the worst over the past couple of days turned out to be true today, but in the end I could have saved myself a couple of days of absolutely torturing myself that I had hurt someone and they were choosing to ignore me, until I knew for certain that was the case.
So I'm still in the same boat, it was the worst thoughts come true, but honestly until they are ready and willing to respond and deal with it, there's no reason for me to fret or worry. Move on until they are ready to handle this. Assume the best, that one day they will want to talk about it. Maybe even address some past hang ups, but this girl right here is not forcing anyone to do anything. When they are ready I will be too.
Until then, I'm going to try and keep taking this challenge to assume the best of myself and others.
I think Sobre Me Stories' summarization of her self centeredness is about spot on for me when it comes to others, and that's no way to live:
And I keep going back to the Sobre Me Stories post, and would it be okay to choose more than ONE word? It is? Okay good.
Assume the best.
And as I typed that, I realized God has already pushed me about 10 different times to try and assume the best, and what do I do? Assume the worst.
Unfortunately the assumption of the worst over the past couple of days turned out to be true today, but in the end I could have saved myself a couple of days of absolutely torturing myself that I had hurt someone and they were choosing to ignore me, until I knew for certain that was the case.
So I'm still in the same boat, it was the worst thoughts come true, but honestly until they are ready and willing to respond and deal with it, there's no reason for me to fret or worry. Move on until they are ready to handle this. Assume the best, that one day they will want to talk about it. Maybe even address some past hang ups, but this girl right here is not forcing anyone to do anything. When they are ready I will be too.
Until then, I'm going to try and keep taking this challenge to assume the best of myself and others.
I think Sobre Me Stories' summarization of her self centeredness is about spot on for me when it comes to others, and that's no way to live:
Oh man, am I guilty of this one. My immediate assumption is that everything Jordan thinks, says, and does is 100% connected to me, his beautiful, charming, and completely selfless wife (See the irony here?). From my selfish perspective, I viewed everything Jordan did as a reflection of me and his heart for me. Not only did this put an enormous amount of pressure on Jordan, it meant that a lot of my value and my self-esteem came from what Jordan said or did on a daily basis. I turned my husband’s opinion of me (whether he meant to express that “opinion” of me or not) into an idol that gave me worth and significance.
Moving forward, we decided that we needed to embrace the reality of our selfish natures: 80% (okay maybe 70%? I’m making this statistic up so who knows) of what we think, say, and do is connected to ourselves and our own issues, NOT to our spouse. Yes, sometimes our comments and actions reflect frustrations and issues that need to be addressed in our marriage. But most of the time, if we’re honest, our actions are more a reflection of our own emotional, mental, and physical state in that given moment.
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